Mind and body health is more that just watching what you eat, getting adequate exercise and sleep. It is also affected by how we think, what we hold onto emotionally and how we react to past and present hurts.
Bad things happen, to everyone, to varying degrees. That is life. No one is perfect, or has the perfect life that can be emulated. Want to know why?
Here it is.
What you want in your life will be different from what I want. What I have experienced will be different from your experiences. How I have reacted to these experiences will be different from how you reacted to your experiences. What I have learned is different from what you learned about life.
We are different, so what is perfect for you won’t be, can’t be entirely perfect for me. So we need to stop trying to emulate others. Ask for advice, use ideas that others have to make their lives they way they want, but make sure that this is tweaked for you. We all do things differently, communicate differently and react differently. What I do, won’t be the same thing as what you would do.
What is perfect for you won’t be, can’t be entirely perfect for me .
Let go of the unrealistic expectations that we believe are expected of us. There are no rules about what a great relationship is, what success is, or what a good family is. Happiness is all that is really talked about, and this concept is open for interpretation.
There is no such thing as a conflict free relationship, you argue, have differing opinions, this is okay and can be part of that perfect scenario you are looking for. I have yet to meet someone who can honestly say to me they have NEVER had a dispute with another person.
However, finding that inner peace, that place where you can truly say…”Hey guess what? I am okay with my life. I actually like who I am at this precise moment”…can be hard. We get so tied up in what others think about us or our own experiences of particular moments that we get lost in the journey to be at peace with who we are and what we have done, or not done.
Regret is an extreme detour to being at peace with yourself. Fear is another block. Recognizing those is the first step to being able to let them go. If you really want to do something, start on the steps to making it happen. You are the only one standing in the way of your happiness. It might mean that you need to make some really challenging decisions that could be seen as hurtful by others, but if they are right for you make them.
You are the only one standing in the way of your happiness.
I need to slow you down a bit now, you do have to consider the impact of your choices on others. Not what they think by the way in which your decision might create ripples in others lives. Particularly with children who rely on you for structure, health and well-being. There are things that we want to do that just aren’t practical in the moment. Be okay with that and come back to those things to see if they are still a need later.
Our beliefs, values and goals in life should be what drives our decisions on how we operate, who we interact with and what we accomplish. If you don’t have answers to what your beliefs, values and goals are, it’s time to start reflecting. Once you have these answers it will be easier to let go of the expectations that might be driving you away from those things that are important to you in your life. The expectations that aren’t making you happy. The reflection has be to yours, truly yours, not what others expect of you.
There are a lot of tools out there for this type of reflection. Google it. Read it. Do it. Be honest with yourself as you move through the journey. No one else is responsible for your own peace. Others can help you get there, but you are ultimately responsible for living it! Your life will be different from mine, but we can both still be at peace with how we are, what we do and where we go!